A Scary Show

It’s the end holiday season, but I think it might also be the beginning of Netflix season.   Everyone is talking about a series or documentary or movie they watched on Netflix.   No confessions needed if you have been binging.

I’ve probably seen 30 facebook posts just on Birdbox.  Well… I am way to chicken to watch that kind of show by myself, so no Birdbox for me.

Last night after getting kids in bed, I turned on something a little less scary…. or maybe more… depending on your perspective.  “Tidying Up with Marie Kondo.”

I actually read her book about 3 years ago and did a major purge of clothes and junk.  I probably got rid of at least 20 bags.

I liked the show and it made me think that I might be due for another purge of stuff.   But then I had a moment of self doubt and panic directly related to my closet.

What if I get rid of some of my “fit” clothes and it is like a sign to the gods (been watching a lot of vikings) that I don’t need them anymore.   Then as I progress in my pregnancy, I buy bigger and bigger clothes with more and more pleats and elastic… and I never ever go back!

I’m not making this up….this exact sequence went through my head.  It probably lives deep in my brain because that was a reality for me after Henry.  2 years after his birth, I was still 40# overweight.

The difference is, at that point, I didn’t purge my “fun,  healthy-weight” clothes, I threw them away because I had given up.  All I had in my closet were “mom” clothes and things that I liked mostly because they covered my body and hid what I didn’t like.

I will not go back to that place again…but the fear still exists.
I am going to do a purge of my closet anyway.  When I fit in those clothes again, post baby, I only need to have stuff I really like.  Regardless of body size, we should have clothes we feel good in.

Does your closet mess with your head?  Do you have 5 different sizes that live in some sort of symbolic tribute to what was or what could be?

Maybe you are due for a closet purge too.  It’s time to get rid of the stuff you don’t like and don’t want.  Those clothes don’t define your future.

Until tomorrow…