Like a bridge…
I have continued with my phone promise. Every morning, I am phone free for 1 hour. The habit is starting to stick. Sometimes I think about getting it to listen to a podcast or something, but then I don’t. I know that will be the beginning of the end of my promise…a slippery slope.
I am proud of sticking to this commitment, but also happy with the results. I like my mornings better and feel a little less tossed by the waves of the world.
Did you stick to your promise? I know a few of you commitments to yourself after my email about my phone problem.
Yesterday I had my 34 week check up. All is well…I only have one more appointment until Josh gets home. I have basically been using appointments to segment the time these past few months. I have my 36 week appointment and then Josh will be here a few days later.
People have started to ask me what it will be like to have him home…good question. It is probably a lot like you expect. Truly a reacquaintance in a lot of ways. Happy then awkward then anxious then restful then sometimes problematic as routines and personalities collide.
Yesterday I caught myself feeling pressure to smooth that reintegration for Josh and the boys…I was aware that I would be the bridge…I will bend and move to buffer all of them…to temper Josh’s Navy-ness and sailor mouth…to pay close attention to the boys’ emotions and needs and protect their quirks and changes. To justify their normal naughty boy behavior…
I even felt this towards the dogs…facilitating the new dynamic.
This is my role in our family. This is my role in a lot of settings actually.
But then I felt tired and remembered I am very pregnant. What if I don’t have it in me to be the bridge? Maybe I need a bridge… I am different…and my hormones are preparing me for labor and birth…then we will have a new baby…and things will be different again.
I know I don’t have to, and can’t, make everything smooth for everyone around me…but it’s in my personality type to feel that need.
Maybe you feel that way too sometimes.
P.S. I had the honor of being interviewed on another podcast. This time I talked a lot about failing and how that shapes my path forward. Download on your podcast app or listen directly here. Hope you guys enjoy it!