Fit Me Pregnancy Journal Day 10: Bleh Thoughts

I just got back from CrossFit class.  It was a perfect way to start my week.  I am still a little sick, but I had another really good night sleep last night so I am definitely on the upswing.  It felt good to sweat.

The heat repairman came first thing this morning and looks like that is fixed.  At least for now, heat pump is kicking again.

Yesterday I got a handful of responses that people wanted help with pull-ups.   I put together a little program and am going to share week 1 with you.   I’ll add to it each week if you want to follow along.

Last night after writing it, I went out to the garage to film a quick video demonstrating the exercises.   As soon as I was finished filming, I looked at the video and said out loud, “I look big.  You can definitely see my belly.”

I didn’t mean it in a good way.  I didn’t like how I looked.
In my head I also thought… you look tired and fluffy.  People are not going to listen to you, because you look bleh.  Stupid thoughts.

I considered changing my shirt and re-filming in something that would hide my body better.   I considered scrapping the video all together and just writing a description of each exercise.

I didn’t do either of those.

I made myself put my video in the post and put my money where my mouth is.   I almost let self criticism and body insecurity get in the way of doing what I like most…coaching and helping people.

My body has a lot more changing to do, and I certainly don’t want to start hiding now.   If I start hiding now… when will it be ok to come out again?  3 months post delivery…6 months….when I reach some “acceptable” body type?

No.   This is where I am at right now.  Nothing to hide.

Hope the pull-up exercises help and hit me up with any questions.

Until tomorrow!