Ok… so my admin alerted me that I skipped like 20 days in my pregnancy journal counter. We went from day 103 to 120 something overnight. Yup…that sounds about right in my head.
Pregnancy brain is real… and “What day is it?” seems like a legitimate question.
Ok… a few quick updates. Bonny slept through the night again last night for the second night in a row!! About 1030-630. I’ll take it.
And…update #2 it was overwhelming and unanimous “no” on the stache. Sorry Josh… that’s a deployment only situation.
Ok….last update. Yesterday I sent messages to 2 “semi famous” or at least “instagram important” people that I think could contribute something cool and valuable to my Fit Me Pregnancy program.
Nothing crazy…basically just me asking one to be an expert interview and the other to be a featured mama.
One responded with “maybe… but probably can’t” and the other didn’t respond at all.
Immediately the bs stories started in my brain.
Of course they will say no… you are not a top level athlete or a insta-model or anyone important.
Your new program is never going to matter….and you don’t have the stones to finish it.
Why do think you can create something like this?
You have too much mom life… too many obligations…too many challenges to have the ability to do this.
You are too chubby.
(I’m not making that last one up)
But then it got quiet in my head… and all of a sudden that shitty feeling transformed.
I hoped they would tell me no. I hoped they would make me feel like I was unimportant or couldn’t do it. I dared them to discount me.
I immediately felt empowered.
Then the real revelation….. whether I succeed or fail has nothing to do with them. I don’t need their permission or anyone else’s. I hope they contribute to the program, but if they don’t….maybe I’ll just reach higher.
I don’t need to be in the cool kids club or have some stupid social media stamp by my name. In fact, 99.99% of the people I am trying to help and support are like me. They won’t be going to the CrossFit games or winning the world of weightlifting or modeling for hundreds of thousands in a glitter thong.
They will be like me….pushing uphill through beautiful and challenging days…trying to feel good and be happy in their bodies, with their families and through their professional work.
That’s my tribe.
And I have every ability to create something amazing for them if I choose.
Maybe I need more no’s. I actually like how it feels.
P.S. If you have a glitter thong and dream of modeling it, you are still in my tribe.