Fit Me Journal Journal 19

Selfish?

 

It’s official.  I am a minivan mom.  A bunch of you sent me emails with encouragement and insight.  It was an overwhelming YES to function, features and convenience.  Last night I pulled the trigger and we got a Chrysler Pacifica.  I sound like a perfect minivan commercial.

I’m not sure if you have been inside one of these newer minivans, but the features are crazy and they are quite different than the vans I rode around in as a kid.   I distinctly remember 2 vans… my mom’s van and my best friend’s mom’s van.  Both hit the mark for utility but I would say they had more “character” than features.

I distinctly remember popping open the back windows and pressing my face into the 2 inch crack to try to get fresh cool air.  The AC was either non existent or inadequate.   Another “feature” on those vans was the ability to hear them from around the block.   We had no excuse not to be ready when we were picked up from sports practice.

Remembering makes me smile.

Honestly… I really never thought I would own a van but I am SUPER pumped about it.   I feel like it is going to make #momlife easier in a ton of ways.   BUT… I want to share something.  Last night when I was sitting down with the finance guy, he asked me why I wasn’t trading in my jeep?  He seemed shocked that I was keeping it.   “Why do you need a jeep?” he asked me.

My answer to him reinforced something I think is super important…but definitely not easy.  I told him the Jeep is my car…like Christy Campbell’s car.  I enjoy it, I like it, I worked hard to buy it.    It isn’t practical or “mom friendly” but it is mine.  I got it for hiking adventures and to enjoy the fresh air… I knew it was perfect for my grungy gym bag and sweaty workout clothes and I most of all, I like how I feel when I drive it.

I think as people, but especially as moms and women, we are too willing to give up on what we like or need…on our individual identity.

I know…technically I don’t “need” a jeep.  And maybe you have rationalized away that you don’t “need” to have a job you like, or Saturdays off, or time to work out, or clothes you feel awesome in, or time to paint or sing or play sports or adventure with friends….so you give up those things.

You’ll do them again….someday.  You’ll get in shape after… You’ll leave the job you hate when…You’ll have more time for you … ?

It’s such a balancing act right…sacrifice…selflessness…hard work…AND at the same time ….not losing yourself.

So… my identity is partially… Josh’s wife….Logan, Henry and Georgia Mae’s mom… but it is also Christy Campbell.

There was a time when I felt less me… I was giving up too much.  And I wasn’t as happy.

So even though I spend lots of Saturdays at the football field for my kids, I take the occasional Saturday to compete in weightlifting competition.  For ME.

And although I am at peace with the physical changes my body made to have babies, I set aside time to workout…even 10 min…so I can feel good in my skin.  For ME.

And as I savor every moment of caring for my newborn, I am happy to start coaching my clients again and get back to my professional passion.  For ME.

So over the last week, I considered trading the jeep in for the van.  I almost did.  I thought I was being selfish or silly or impractical.  But in this case.. I decided I’d rather rock both versions of Christy Campbell.

For ME.

What do you need to do for YOU?

Until tomorrow,

Christy